How To Be Authentic 5 Hot Tips
What does it mean to be authentic? Are you being the truest version of yourself?
I sat down with Dr Sajad Vahedi, Relationship Pattern Expert, who is teaching his clients how to be authentic.
Being true to yourself is not easy in a noisy world that projects so many expectations on us about what makes us ‘good enough’. We change ourselves to fit in. We make ourselves small to please others. Here are 5 hot tips on how to be authentic.
1. How To Be Authentic 5 hot tips – Express Your Needs
How to be authentic – 5 hot tips.
A true sign of authenticity is the ability to confidently express your preferences and desires. It means being in touch with your genuine self. Your genuine needs, wants and desires, free from the fear of rejection or abandonment.
You may have a remarkable talent for understanding the wants and needs of others. You can easily express your partner’s favorite food, color, and even movie choices. Yet, when asked about your own preferences, you draw a blank. You may have spent your life so attuned to others you’ve lost touch with your own desires.
This disconnect often stems from a past where you learned to prioritize meeting others’ needs out of fear, rather than love. The fear of not being good enough or being rejected drives you to become a people-pleaser, causing you to abandon yourself.
Becoming your authentic self involves breaking free from this pattern. Authentic individuals can confidently express their preferences without fear. It’s not about arrogance but about asserting your true self in a grounded and peaceful manner.
If you’re on the journey to self-authenticity, you may feel uncomfortable asserting your wants and needs at first. This is entirely normal. Start small. Practice by expressing your preferences in everyday situations. As you progress, you’ll become more at ease with this process, and it will become second nature.
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2. How To Be Authentic 5 hot tips – Learn To Be Assertive
How to be authentic – 5 hot tips.
If you’re in a relationship and have been feeling abandoned, embracing your authentic self will lead to increased assertiveness. While this may initially feel foreign and uncomfortable, it’s a crucial step in your healing journey. Start by asserting your preferences and desires in small situations. Gradually, you’ll become more confident and assertive, all whilst still respecting your partner’s preferences and desires.
3. How To Be Authentic 5 hot tips – Live In The Present
How to be authentic – 5 hot tips.
Being authentic is about living in the present. Living in the past means you are trapped living as your old, powerless self. The one who did not get what she needed, played small and tried her best to please others. Living in the present isn’t about erasing the past or eliminating the future. It’s about finding a balanced perspective that allows you to navigate life without the emotional baggage of your history. The past remains as memories, some happy, some sad, and some painful, but they no longer burden you.
Healing involves connecting your present pain to your past and, when necessary, revisiting and reliving your past emotions. This process helps you objectively extract wisdom and lessons from your past, transforming painful experiences into valuable life lessons.
As you release the grip of past pain, your ability to plan for the future improves, replacing stress and anxiety with rational planning. In the process, you realize that you cannot change your past, but you can alter how you perceive it, taking the pain out of it and learning valuable lessons.
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4. How To Be Authentic 5 hot tips – Releasing Anger And Blame
How to be authentic – 5 hot tips.
Anger and blame often surface when dealing with your past. It’s natural to feel angry, and it’s an inevitable step in the healing journey. Initially, anger may be directed at those who caused you pain, often your parents. It’s essential to embrace this anger as part of the process.
As you work through your emotions, the anger gradually evolves into a more objective understanding. You may realize that your parents, like everyone, were human, imperfect, and perhaps unaware of the pain they caused. This is not true for everyone, however this shift allows you to replace anger with a more balanced perspective, making room for more love in your life.
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5. How To Be Authentic 5 Hot Tips – You Have Choices
How To Be Authentic – 5 hot tips
Ultimately, healing is about understanding that you have a choice in how you feel. You choose who you spend time with. You choose who you love. You can choose to love your parents and maintain a loving relationship with them, not because you feel obligated or responsible, but because it’s what you genuinely want. Equally you can choose not to have a relationship with them. You can choose to continue friendships and relationships that serve you and are in your best interests, or you can let those relationships go.
However, choosing to move beyond anger and blame is a powerful and liberating choice. It’s a step toward living authentically and reclaiming your life from the clutches of your past. Your life is precious, and embracing your authentic self is the path to living it fully and free from past burdens.
This blog post is taken from my podcast chat with Dr Sajad Vahedi, Relationship Pattern Expert, who helps you break your toxic relationship patterns and show up as your authentic self so you can build and maintain healthy intimate relationships. You can connect with Dr Sajad Vahedi HERE. Use the code mybigloveproject2023 for a 10% discount off his services.
